Trails and Travails

Thanks everyone!

Looks like cake is the word of the day. Remember, this was a packed, glutinous rice cake, so a little different than the fluffy stuff that comes to mind. I think either would be good as a carb-load, though.

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Legs were more trashed this morning than yesterday, which makes sense given that I usually feel the worst 48 hours after a workout of any kind. Which basically meant that this morning's 6-miler was a bit of a drag. HR monitor was acting up again, which just added to the frustration, so I slipped it down around my waist and just took it easy. Not as easy as I probably should've, since I was still putting forth some kind of effort at times, but I'd say this one still definitely qualifies as an easy run. 8:14 average pace. Not bad, and the legs feel better now that they've got a few miles in them today.

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Hoping to drag Aileen on the entire run with me this afternoon, since she actually responded very positively to our half-mile jaunt together. Going to try and check out her stride, too, to see if that could be what's causing her knee problems when she runs for an extended period. And yes, Chas, I got a good one. Took a hell of a lot of work - and still does - but good indeed.

Back to doing doubles two days after a self-imposed marathon? Running out of superlatives... Checking out her stride? Yeah right....

John Kilpatrick wrote:Back to doing doubles two days after a self-imposed marathon? Running out of superlatives... Checking out her stride? Yeah right....

That's not the only thing he's checking out

6 this morning. Average pace 6:51. Last 4.5 were a progressive tempo averaging 6:35 (NGP = 6:19, since it was a net uphill of ~150'). Can anyone tell I was a bit... Emotional?

Let's just say that for being a self-described endurance athlete, I'm not very good at enduring.

Very nice Mike!

Good run Mike...You seem to be "enduring" pretty well

Ha, well, I never doubt my ability to endure in running. It just doesn't seem to extend to other parts of my life... Oh well. Just the stress of an impending move + the "end" of a relationship getting to me. Sigh.

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Little bit more than 3 miles ~7:45 pace this afternoon. I suck at starting fast, so this one actually felt a lot harder than it should have.

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15 with 10-12 at "race effort" tomorrow as my final prep run for the 30k I'm running next Saturday. Pretty big (~800-1000') hill that should mimic the hill in the actual race. Hoping to average ~7:00/mi for the work interval.

I get you, Mike. I would gather that enduring the physical part is much easier than than the saying goodbye (at least for a while). That is worse than any pulled muscle, etc. Hang in there buddy.

A 30K race sounds interesting - it should be fun to test all of your recent work with a hilly course - you certainly have been putting the time in!

Mike, finally trying to catch up on your blog. You really do put a lot of work in. And it's great that you're so young as you can really maximize your potential. You have a lot more knowledge of how to train than I did many years ago. It looks like you're making good progress. Keep up the good work!



Attended a conference in the OC last year and took a side trip to Crystal Cove SP. Really enjoyed running the trails and hills along the coast. Very beautiful scenery.

This morning sucked. By which I mean I woke up feeling like I hadn't slept (I guess I didn't, really) and was still emotionally drained. Ugh. Knew that the run was gonna be a bit of a grind, but the first few steps again elicited a muttered "mother fucker..." Legs still hadn't really loosened up by 2.5 miles in, but it was time to start the race effort anyway.

The first mile made me want to cry. Seriously, I have no idea what was going on with me, but I just felt complete despair. The second mile wasn't much better. Fortunately, I found a groove until the fourth mile, where the hill jumps from 3.5% to 11% for half a mile then just under 10% for another half mile. Lots more "mother fucker"s, but these ones were mostly in capital letters and started with "COME ON!" I whined and grunted my way up the last mile before turning around, shoving a granola bar in my mouth, and completing one of the most ridiculous descents I've ever done. Seriously, with legs of jello - not just the major muscle groups, but the stabilizing ones, too - I was flopping down at a sub-6 minute pace, just hoping not to faceplant, while trying to chew a very chewy granola bar with a completely dry mouth and no water. Fun!

The five miles back downhill were considerably easier than those uphill, but still hurt pretty badly. I'm improving at running downhill, concentrating on high knee movement and running from the hips, but I need to be honest with myself: my legs are trashed. Completely. They need some serious time off, and I'm trying to figure out how to balance that need with keeping up my training over the next 10 days. More on that in a minute.

I decided to tack on one last mile of the race effort, and of course it became more of a LT effort than an MP effort. Not that the first part was an MP effort; more like 20-mile effort, probably.

So, here's a fun elevation chart. The first 2 miles of the climb are 2.4%, then the 2 miles at 3.5% as mentioned above, then the last mile averages 8.6%, mainly due to the "flat" part at the top. Before that, it's pushing 10%. I was happy to see my HR pretty steady going both uphill and downhill, though the NGP values are pretty skewed. I think this is because I really couldn't go much faster than barely-sub-6 down that steep mile, and the NGP for that mile is almost 10:00. The next 4 are 7:20, which sounds a bit more like it.



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To wrap things up:
Like I said a second ago, my legs are trashed. My muscles are fatigued enough that they're allowing a lot of the impact to be absorbed by my joints, and while I'm not feeling anything too incapacitating, I want fresh legs for this 30k. My plan for the next week is:
F - off
S - 12 easy
S - 11 with just a couple at today's effort level
M - 9 double recovery
T - 14 double recovery
W - 14-15 double, one with a couple miles at today's effort level, other recovery
Th - 10 double recovery
F - 6 double recovery
S - 30k
Not exactly a true taper by any means, but it's a way to still get 90 miles in next week without a run longer than 8 miles before the weekend. And other than those short intervals at race effort, the intensity level of next week will be laughable. Hoping this helps me heal up a bit.

After a complete day of rest, I should feel great on today's easy 12-miler, right? ...Right?

I'm ready for running to feel good again. I'm ready to not be a whining bitch for the first 3-4 miles of a run. I'm ready for my fucking legs to stop hurting so badly, for all my connective tissues to loosen up, for my muscles to stop spasming during those awful first 3-4 miles... I promised my legs that if they'd just shut up and move forward without causing me nearly debilitating pain - okay, I'm only slightly exaggerating - I'd stretch them when I got home. And yeah, I will hold to that promise. I'll become a goddamn yogi for the next week if it means my legs will finally feel good.

At least my body is rested. 12 miles @ 8:07 pace is a cardiovascular cake. And I'm glad I stuck with it, because by the end, my legs felt waywaywaywayway better than when I started, which I don't think would've happened if I'd broken the run into a 7-8 with 4-5 more this afternoon.

I know, I know, I need to just relax about this all, but right now I'd like my running to be the thing that completely steals me away from the rest of the stress in my life, not adds to it.

Time to channel some David Foster Wallace. This is Water. This is Water. This is Water.

Mike MacLellan wrote:I'd like my running to be the thing that completely steals me away from the rest of the stress in my life, not adds to it.

Then make it so. Peace is a choice.

No worries Mike. You have a ot of recovery runs scheuled for this week. Your legs will thank you for that and they will be feeling good in no time. Then all will be right in the world again.

Woooooooo-saaaaaaaah. Mark, I had a moment akin to your post today. Not necessarily regarding peace, but regarding perspective. I realized I could hold onto my anger at someone for not doing things exactly as I'd hoped, or I could see their perspective and realize that their actions held no malicious intent. Tomorrow, I will find peace. Then I will crush a 4-5 mile section of the run. Then I will find some more peace.

Mike MacLellan wrote:Woooooooo-saaaaaaaah. Mark, I had a moment akin to your post today. Not necessarily regarding peace, but regarding perspective. I realized I could hold onto my anger at someone for not doing things exactly as I'd hoped, or I could see their perspective and realize that their actions held no malicious intent. Tomorrow, I will find peace. Then I will crush a 4-5 mile section of the run. Then I will find some more peace.

Yes, my mind is always making promises that my legs can't keep...

One foot in front of the other - you'll get where you're going!

12. 3 at what I'd like to pretend is "30k effort," but even the NGP was above 7:00 pace. Barely. Whatever, it's done. This is me trying to smile and make peace with things. It's sort of working.

Hang in there, Mike. You have increased your mileage, workload, and intensity all at the same time so much that a mental and physical backdown might be a good thing. If I was you, you'd probably tell me the same thing. You are making huge strides - I don't want to see you burning out when you are making so much headway. You've got a lot of life stress on you now too - it will get better I'm sure.

John - Exactly what was going through my head as I said to myself, "y'know, this workout just isn't happening. You should stop pushing it and just coast home." I've definitely set myself up for a glorious burnout and/or injury, so it's time to listen to my own advice - you're right, I'd tell you to take it easy, too - "When your training isn't going the way you want, it's time to back off, not to ramp it up."

So, how do I balance backing off while not losing the gains I've been making? I don't really know. I'm going to try to pack in a lot of slow miles tomorrow and Tuesday, then give myself W-F as a sharp 3-day taper before my race. But if I don't get in the mileage I want this week, no big deal. It'll just be a double-cutback, and it won't affect me in any negative way in December. Hell, I'd rather suck up my pride and take another huge cutback if it means I'll race well on Saturday.

I realized today that I'm incredibly bored with my routes here. Even when cruising at a nice 7:30 pace, which normally corresponds to complete and utter zen-like bliss, I was bored as shit. I was asking myself why I'm doing this. And I didn't have a good answer. Hoping the change in scenery helps...

That said, the legs don't hurt anymore. Not bad, anyway. They're just tired. I'm just tired. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. None of this surprises me, it's just disappointing that it's all happening at the same time. Wooooooo-saaaaaaah.

In other news, I'm probably 80% packed into boxes, most of which will be going in the cars tomorrow. So at least tomorrow should be stress-free. And I put out an open invitation to everyone coming to my going-away gathering/dinner/thing to come run with me around the small, flat-ish lake nearby. I think I have a few takers. That should be fun.

Its sort of eerie, but you describe some of the same feelings I was having a couple-few weeks ago. Your blog told me exactly what I needed to hear - don't worry so much about a setback when you have a lot of work put in behind. Funny how that works out, but it is reassuring to see you going through the same thing - I have a lot of confidence in what you are doing! You'll not gain much by killing it this week anyway and I can't wait to hear about your upcoming race...

John Kilpatrick wrote:Hang in there, Mike. You have increased your mileage, workload, and intensity all at the same time so much that a mental and physical backdown might be a good thing. If I was you, you'd probably tell me the same thing. You are making huge strides - I don't want to see you burning out when you are making so much headway. You've got a lot of life stress on you now too - it will get better I'm sure.

+1,000,0000

After thoroughly burning myself out last summer, I can attest to what John says. If you push yourself over the edge of the cliff, it takes a long time to climb back. Sometimes, less is more.

Glad your legs aren't hurt...I've burned out quite a few times, actually almost every late summer/early fall I'm there and then being forced to not run much during the icy weeks/months of winter gives me a fresh desire to run again. but it isn't fun and it's hard. You've been training so well and putting a lot of time and miles in so it's very understandable. Not sure of the cure, maybe having some fun non-running things to think about?

Sorry I'm not much of a help. I hope your race goes great on Saturday.

First and foremost, you guys are all awesome. Even if I'm kind of blah in my blog when I'm going through the shit, I eventually come around and realize how much support you guys are offering.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I'm reintroducing myself to the world. Hello, world; I missed you.

As this morning's post-run text to Aileen said: "It's amazing how much better running feels when I just calm the fuck down." And I mean about everything. I tend to just laugh it off when someone says something to me like, "You have so many rules... with your training, your bedtime, your schedule, your eating..." But it's kind of true. And I get really crazy about following those rules.

But really, if I'm not enjoying it, and it's not bringing me peace/happiness, why am I doing it? I don't run for results; I hate racing, actually. I hate running under pressure. My satisfaction doesn't come from a good performance - though I love when I post a good result - but from the act of running itself. And if the act of running is being overshadowed by something else, something stress-inducing... What am I doing?

Sure, a lot of this wave of calm comes from the fact that yesterday was just an extremely good day. And sure, some of it comes from the fact that I got an e-mail from the NF50 directors today that started with, "We're 16 weeks out!" SIXTEEN WEEKS. Sixteen weeks before my last marathon, I was only on week 2 of my "official" training. I didn't even look at my watch; I just posted mileage. The speed came around 8 weeks after that, and only when that happened did I even consider incorporating tempo workouts into my schedule. Up until that point, it was slow, easy, recovery, with the occasional MP interval thrown in there.

So yeah, it's time to reevaluate. Burnout 16 weeks from a race is just silly... So I won't let this be a burnout. Just a wake-up call. Hey Mike, slow down, take it easy, and start enjoying the simple act of placing one foot in front of the other.

8.something miles this morning at close-to-zero effort. 8:06 average pace.

I think you're cured - at least that is my motherly advice

Great blog post Mike and you know what it is so true. Like you have found myself at times going what the hell am I doing this for?

All the pressure of performing, running fast and for what? Don't get me wrong I want to achieve and I want to do well like you do but at what cost? I can tell that cost is not losing my excitement and fun for running.

That is why I'm so glad that I have found the trails and have found myself again in a very peaceful place called nature.

Again I still have to get all my thoughts together and get my ass in gear and post an entry about it in my own blog but going forward I'm just going out and running. And while out running I'm going to enjoy every moment of it all and enjoy the fact that I can go out and run with Lisa and whatever the results are at races let them be what they may. I really don't care other then I'm having fun and give it 100%.

Happy to read you have found yourself again also buddy!